Miss....

Monday, June 29, 2009

I keep saying that I miss home. People always ask me “What do I miss about home?”
That got me thinking. What is it really that I miss?
I’m going to make a list now. As you can see, I am too free lol

I miss my mummy. She used to fuss over me whenever I go home after being away for a long while. Me and tricia wouldn’t protest because secretly we like to be pampered and hugged by our mummies ^^
I miss my daddy. Not his temper but that seems that the infamous temper has left the Kam household, leaving a very pleasant oldman behind. Why does it always take age to soften something hard and stubborn eh? XD
I miss my brother. I cant say little brother because he is 1.5 times my height now. He is taller and he is bigger. Very much mature for his age but will revert back to the 12 year old that he was whenever he and I wish to take a trip down memory lane…. Except that now I no longer hug him into my arms. He hugs me into his. I feel so protected
I miss my lovely one-of-a-kind TRICIA!!! My gym buddy! My shopping and hangout kaki. My American Idol buddy. My gossip source. My movie kaki. My music updater (she discovers new songs and I download them for both of us). My er fashion sense (I have none so she will update me on the latest trends and explain what they are). My crazy quirky funny loveable Tricia! There’s no one like her. Gosh I miss her sooo much! Cos shes my only best friend I haven’t seen for the longest time. Even though both our lives are so crazy and I miss her so much, she is also the best friend I keep in touch with the most. I message her the most (after howard). When I see you tri, you better stand still so I can have my fill of hug of you!
I miss Wee Nee. Currently doing her internship. She should have come for Infosys. I didn’t know that it could be counted as an internship too. Wasted opportunity. Shes the toughest girl I know. So determined. So resilient. She never gives up. Soldiers on no matter what. Against all odds. I miss her. Roti canai is not the same without her
Mei lin keeps creeping up my mind too haha. The only other super tall person in my life besides my brother. But I don’t feel that you are towering over me. I feel that we are on equal grounds (my ego made up for the loss of height I suppose haha) we can go on and on and on for hours, can’t we? I saw her most the last few times I went back so I don’t miss her as much but quite often she will creep into my mind and pounce on me! Haha. WHEN YOU COMING OVER?????
Ahh…. Jing Zi. Havent kept in touch with her since august last year. Gosh has it really been a year?? Geez. Everytime when July semester is about to start, I will start to think of her already because that is when she is coming back. 2 (or was it 3?more?) years already at Newcastle and she still has not adopted any western culture. Good for you! Haha. Love people who has a firm ground on who they are (you too mei lin)
Mich…mich…. Always wanting to steal my brother for her ownself haha. Currently back in KL already. I miss the good old days where I would go to work then after work I would go wake miss princess and we would go for lunch then just hangout. Life was simple back then. In many ways she was my substitute for a boyfriend, company-wise la. She was there for me, had fun with me, talked about anything from the sun to the stars to the moon. Haha I even gave her my first diary. That was how close we were
Gosh I think this list is getting too long yet I haven’t even scratched the surface of what I miss! Haha no wonder I’m so homesick! I miss the food, I miss the sea, I miss DURIAN!!!! I miss the hectic Penangite life. I even miss the GSC we have there! I miss my bed and the 32 inch Television! I miss…I miss…..i…i…. *explodes with miss*

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People

My dad always tell me that there are 3 types of people. Those who sit and complain that great things don’t happen to them. Those who watch great things happen to others. Those who make great things happen. It’s not hard to sort people out into these categories.


I hate chronic complainers. Hate them. Annoying little brats is what they are. Stubborn, spoiled, annoying and thick-skinned. Seems to be I always meet these sorry losers. No no, I won’t name any of them. The strangest thing about these people is that they don’t realize it. All the unpleasant people don’t realize how unpleasant they are. The funniest thing is instead of knowing that they are unpleasant and that they should change their ways if want to have friends, they think that they are the world’s most popular people and that they have no flaws. Maybe that’s why I find them so annoying.

People are strange creatures, don’t you think so? We are the only creatures who after getting injured, comeback for more. Time and time again after crashing from a heartbreak, we are back for more. After falling off a horse, we climb back up it again. After totaling a car, we buy a new one and drive again. As if we are asking for more pain in our life. Strange isn’t it?

I always had this theory hehe. Christians and Muslims are not going to be happy reading this. I always wondered to myself why we have so many idiots running around. Its like, for every intelligent mortal (as nature intended) there are 10 morons running around. Yup, that ratio is about right. Then one day I came to my own conclusion to my question. The reason incest is taboo/forbidden is because when 2 DNA that is that similar mixed together, they will cause genetic mutation. Why I don’t know. In my head logically I think if u take a pair of identical twins and mate their DNA, you would be cloning them. Anyway, for some reason, close DNA will give you retarded kids. Dating back to Adam and Eve, Eve was supposedly made from Adam’s ribs. Means she is part of him. They share the same DNA. Then they mated. Based on probabilities, their offspring is like a cross between cloning and incest. If incestual babies are retards, then the human race after Adam and Eve are therefore, retards. Then I don’t know how (because I am neither Christian or Muslim) the human population grew with Adam and Eve’s family as the first human family. How? They needed to breed among each other. Means…. Having sex within the family. More retards. So….. are we a product of retards? The probability of having a retard or mentally disable child nowadays with 2 similar DNAs is high but not 100%. Maybe that’s why we have geniuses, the commoners and the dimwits. Perhaps when the human race was born, we were meant to be geniuses. Our brains are made that way. Look at the human body defense system! We were tasked to care after mothernature and all her offsprings. Look at what we have done. Look at the state of Earth. If mothernature truly exist, she is going to be one hell of a bitch when she discovers the condition of Earth. I have this feeling that I will live to see Earth get destroyed. Not by aliens. Not by some end of the world notion. I believe Earth will perish on the hands of humans. Some idiot will accidently set off a nuclear bomb, which will prompt all the big guns to show whose nuclear bomb can create the biggest crater in the world. We will eat all the fishes in the sea til they are all extinct. Those which survived will be poisoned by our human waste and stupidity and our lazy garbage disposal methods. Our ”advance” technology to manipulate the poultry to make them grow fat and large and fast will create billions of new deadly virus and super bacteria that will in turn, kill humans (H1N1). AIDS is doing a fine job, killing people left and right slowly and painfully because of a man who couldn’t keep his dick in his pants, away from monkey and his human wife. I can go on and on and on but even I am losing my appetite for this entry.

Growing up makes you aware. Growing up makes you mature. I just finished reading The Golden Compass. It is a good read. Talks about original sin and growing up. About being naïve and innocent. Original sin is when Adam and Eve first defied God and bit the apple. Up until 5 minutes ago I didn’t understand what original sin was. Now I know. God intended us to be innocent and happy as children are happy. Did anyone watch Dollhouse? It’s a series on TV about how there is an organization who has a bunch of hot looking guys and girls that had their memory wiped out and now has a mentality of a child until someone hires them. Then they will be programmed to be the best in whatever the client needs them to be. Hunter, date, negotiator, you name it, you got it. I look at them and I don’t call that happiness. To be innocent and ignorance of the worlds evil. To be denied the mistakes I made which I learn valuable lessons from. To be… emotionless. Unable to think for myself. I don’t call that life. I don’t call that happiness. I’m happy that Adam and Eve made that mistake. They were curious and rebellious. That is human nature. You can’t get any more human than that. It was a lost cause from the beginning. If God wanted Adam and Eve as pets who lived happily at the Garden with the mentality of children, he should not have given them a brain, curiosity and rebellion instinct. Oh well. Guess even God can’t always get what he wants.

People always want what they can’t have. We are constantly working for something. We just can’t sit still as a race, can we? Haha. The man who has everything, will always say he is looking for something because he is bored thus he is looking for entertainment. If I were king and I had everything I needed, I wonder if I would be bored. Probably. Maybe that’s why rulers are usually so mean and cruel. They always have this dark side to them. It is because they are so bored they are willing to try anything that gives them some distraction and pleasure, even if it is for awhile. Since they have money and influence, what is stopping them?

We are deplorable as a race, aren’t we?

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Randomness....

Yesterday was day 1 of the new intake. My gawd there were SO many!!! Mostly Malays which means the number of Chinese intake in local universities have dropped. I wonder why. Is it because the government did not give or are we turning them down?

This year the newbies are registering at the main campus. We are finally moving in!!! im kind of proud of my main campus. Its HUGE! Hehe. Land in Malacca is cheap.

Sigh. Today is Monday already. In 6 days I will be going to university as a 3rd year now. Sigh. I feel so old. The newbies look so young! I miss home a lot. Been thinking of skipping the first few days so that I can perhaps nick a short 3 days at Penang. But I need to clean out my new room out. I HAVE MY OWN ROOM!!! FINALLY!!!

Hehe those who want to come visit me now have a place to stay already hehe!!!
I bought a bed that is foldable. Very cool. Found 2 mattress for rm30. Its now on howards bed. So for the time being his bed is made up of THREE mattress!!! Ahahahahahaha damn comfy la. When I lie down on it, it feels like…like….nothing. im sleeping on air. Such comforts.

My time at King’s Hotel is now coming to an end. Honestly, I have never regretted anything in my life. Until now. I regret joining this course. Somehow I feel that the end does not justify the means. There are so many things I wanted to do. So much more that I wanted to experience. All I got to show for it is a fat belly from 8weeks of eating greasy malay food 3 times a day and 2 fails to show for it. Sigh. My major is so obscure that nothing I learn here, I think, can be applied on my major. I think I will have a hard time fitting into the real world.

Speaking of the real world, I now remember what was the purpose of this blog already. I think all of us were very happy when we heard that English was to be the medium for Science and Maths. In fact, I was envious. Now there is talk of changing it back to Malay. =.=
Not only the government is backing this idea but also the opposition. Wth. We are suppose to be moving FORWARD, not backward! Everyday I read about various politicians who would give their views about how Bahasa Malaysia is being threatened by the usage of English in this two subjects. Hello… we are taking 10 subjects for SPM. 3 out of 10 subjects are hardly threatening. If the Malaysian will to keep their heritage and culture is so weak, then which language we use to learn is hardly the main issue. The problem with these politicians is that they are not the students. They don’t know how it is like to learn everything in Malay only to have to relearn everything again in English. It didn’t matter how much knowledge we acquire in Science and Maths because at an international level, we know nothing. Because it is ALL in English! How do you expect us to compete in an international level?? Or hold discussions with international scholars when we are not even using the same terms and language? This is a step backwards. The government is going about this the wrong way. Why bother to ask the politicians when it does not concern them? Its like asking a trishaw peddler what is the best way to treat cancer. Sure, he can give you his views but he has to credentials to give them. Why would he? It has nothing to do with him! If the government truly wants what is best for the country’s future, they should be conducting a nationwide survey comprising ONLY the students! If at university level is conducted fully in English, what logic does it make to start the student’s foundation in Bahasa Melayu?

The government policy changes based on politician’s whim and fancy. The nation’s future leaders are paying the heavy price. How is the country suppose to grow? We as students have been very patient with the government. We are forced to carry heavy books to school, made to endure a full day school, study subjects which is not of our interest but are forced to score nevertheless. Let me ask these bright politicians, how many times in your life have you applied everything you learned in school? Look at the Americans. They are able to choose their subjects much earlier and more freedom than we do. It enables them to pursue their interest at an earlier age, giving them a headstart. They need not waste their time with subjects such as Moral. Moral values such as integrity and respect cannot be learned in a classroom from a thick, boring textbook by memorizing definitions. Singapore adopts a much longer school hours per day than Malaysians. I don’t know what they teach in class but when I talk to my cousin, he is far more knowledgeable than the Malaysian’s his age. He knows about world history. He knows about world geography. He knows more general knowledge than I do and I am 7 years older than he is. So did Singapore got it right? While our leaders are using us all as guinea pigs to justify their political agendas, the world is passing Malaysians by. My batch was the guinea pig batch. We were the first to take EST(which was compulsory for my school and is now abolished =.=) we were the first to take Science and Maths in English at Form4 and Form 5. I can tell you we were not happy about the switch. It was for the better because English is the language of Science but the transition period was hard. Science has many many scientific terms and while we studied it in Malay, it was another term. Giving that same fate to future students is not a bright idea.

When all is said and done, most of the time I can see that the Malaysian politicians can’t see or think further than 3 feet in front of them. Maybe they should play more chess and less politicking. The future of our country is getting bleaker and bleaker by the minute. Elections are determined by the young voters. I myself am a young voter and we want change. We don’t want has-beens ruling this country. We don’t want dramas and fake promises. We want brilliance. We want foresight. We want someone worthy of being a leader. We are in fact, losing out to our fellow neighbours like Philippines. Soon oil will run out. Soon we will be just like any other countries who don’t have any advantages. Soon we will all become a third world country like Africa. At least they are not delusional


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At the end of the day....

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Darling, i am fickle minded. i talk of leaving. i talk of independence. i talk of separation. i crap at length about how i demand more and you can never fulfill them.

when you hold me in a full embrace and my head is at that special crook of your arm that seems somehow designed for my head size, i forget everything. my place is there.
forget whatever i have ever said. it all boils down to nothing the minute you hold me in your arms the way you do and tell me with those sincere eyes how much you miss me. nothing you can say that will speak more of how much you love me than those brown (or isit black?) eyes. guess your are stuck with me. cos im never leaving

NEVER

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today suck!

Friday, June 26, 2009

Today suck. its my anniversary and i picked a fight over the silliest thing. i failed my last test. have to retake the whole 5 bloody hours. Michael Jackson died. he was the one who got me through the last 7weeks.
i hate myself. i hate today

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Happy Anniversary!

Thursday, June 25, 2009

WOW. 22months! darling its been awhile eh? hehe
kinda feels long tho. feels like a lifetime ago when you asked me to be yours. to many people 22months is nothing in a relationship but i feel like everyday is something and we cant take it for granted. that is why i insist on making the 26th of every month a special day. its to remind me never to take you for granted.


Absence makes the heart grow fonder. TRUE.
Right now you are faraway in some jungle doing something i would love doing. while i am here stuck in Malacca with the night off,thinking about you in my room. Since we were unable to chat as usual thanks to your lovely trainers, ill just tell you whats on my mind here

Woke up late. Skipped breakfast. lunch was lousy. i ate fruits and 2 peice of kuih only. yes it was that lousy. had a headache all day. my partner kept coughing and was having flu and fever. i panicked myself thinking it was H1N1. had a mild fever too after my nap.but it went away. so i scared myself shitless for nothing haha.

today was very boring. i finished what i could do already so i just gamed the whole day. after 5 hours, the zombies look...boring. i actually begged for work to do lol. INFOSYS HAS TURNED ME INTO A WORKAHOLIC!!!!! i need help.... =\

Called wee nee....who helped me cure my boredom (girlfriends are the best!!)
everytime i call her she would ask when im coming home...(she sounds like my boyfriend lol) and i will tell her i dont have a holiday....everytime i will hear the disappointment and i will ask myself wth i am doing here. SIGH
we miss our roti canai days.

i met a wonderful friend here. she is sooo chatty and upbeat you cant be sad around her haha. but she left on tuesday and wont be coming back until at least sunday so i am without my morning sunshine in this gloomy place til then. GOOD LUCK PING!!!!
(shes going for her VIVA. to get her masters finally)

it doesnt matter how much your other half means to you, at the end of the day, girlfriends are the one which you count on. the one you depend on. it doesnt matter that they are not family. together with them and your actual family you form your line of support.

~No man is an island~


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a day off!!!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Since my last post i have had....2 test. haha. they suck. i may have to retake. it sucks.

after the test tho they announced that they were giving us the day off!! whee!!! for once we were given a free day and theres no pending work. so after i sent my friend off to the bus terminal, guess what i did??

Kam Hui Ming is officially LOVING karaoke!!! hahaha
betcha yall who knows me didnt see that coming


so tired nwow..going to bed early for once....

sweet dreams everyone

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MISERY!!!!

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Sigh....ive been off the face of the virtual world for 5weeks already.can u imagine that??!!!! FIVE WEEKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Isit worth it? i dont know.... everyday my lovely tricia will remind me of what she is doing that day for fun.without me =.=''
i love my friend dearly but...but......im going to kill her when i see her!!!! then i will hug her =)
things have been so mad i dont know what day is when already. time and space have been lost to me. i just know i wake up before 7, breakfast at 7 then go up to the lab to stare at codings until its time to eat.then back to the freezing hell(21'C mind you) until 5pm.then rest til after dinner. at 8pm i would go back and OT until about 2am.that is early. then i do it all over again. life is so routine i get lost. even when it is sunday i still have the same routine.it doesnt matter what day it is.

They serve us crappy food. and i mean CRAPPY FOOD!
crappy food is just something i have to live with for as long as i am studying at malacca.if i were to hold penang standard here im afraid i would die of starvation. we are staying at a 3star hotel.not only thy are serving crappy food, it is also food that is near or has just passed the expiry date. ever heard of sour honeydew? we get them daily. many of us ran to the toilet daily. i am quite fortunate. i only run to the toilet every other day.

sigh. all that ive grown immune to it already. food and the stress i think has become the second nature to us university students. we are no longer affected by it. sleep is a luxury.yes we bitch about it. yes we complain and make a ruckus. but we are used to it. what we are not used to is missing our loved ones. today is fathers day.to my daddy it is just another daay.if i were home it would be just another sunday at home relaxing too.but since im not home,i miss him even more. i miss everyone at home. the other day wee nee called me to chat. it made me so happy to hear a familiar voice. sure being here day with the same faces makes them familiar too...but somehow it is different. there is that special bond but im missing my old life. my friends...my family....the activities we used to do.... i miss my life. i miss life. i miss penang. i used to wait for the long holidays to have my fill but this time there is no such fate. i go straight back to university after this course ends.

dont get me wrong. somehow,we managed to have fun among the stress and pressure. chang told us we will have to work hard like we have never worked hard before but we will also have the best time of our lives.at the same time. i didnt believe him. but it is true.


ok being cut off from the virtual world also means im back to being 'katak di bawah tempurung' since my source of news is online. i had to resort to........the mainstream media =.=' which is basically no news. in all the worlds turmoil and issues, i saw one day the headline for berita harian was.... ibu dan anak bertemu semula selepas 17 tahun. and then the building which collapse and killed the destruction workers was on page 2. or was it 4? my point is, the mainstream media is bullshit. i dont know why i still read because everyday i spend 30minutes reading the paper(because i read in detail, not just headlines) and i go away with nothing. nothing important is in the pages. the things i get are like, man murders wife on honeymoon trip. the kill bill actor dies from a sex act(came out 3 times in the papers.really, no other new??? ANY news????)

the government is always ranting about the evil of blogs and that is all rubbish an lies. hello,we are not naive. there are intelligent citizens in Malaysia. if you dont give us news, we search elsewhere la. i stopped buying the mainstream media newspapers because they contain ZERO information!!! naive and innocent people dont read the news. so you will have to do better if you want to at LEAST attempt to change our minds.

the more i read, the more i wish we adopted the China's method to corruption. line them up, and the open fire. but that is just a dream. in reality we arent cruel like that. we are cruel in more.... behind the curtains way.

thats all for now. gotta head back to the codings. miss you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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